If I Had a Brother

I wanted to tell the story of Robin Hood from the point of view of King Richard’s brother, left at home to manage the country.

TTTO “If I Had a Boat”

[Refrain]
If I had a bro’
Who’d rule this goddamn country
And if he had a throne
To rule this country from
And we could all together
Live in this great country
Leading it to greatness in the world

If there were a robber
I would go out and stop him
I couldn’t bring myself to letting him go free
And though he helps the poor
He helps them cheat on taxes
And taxes help the country, I’m sure you will agree

[Refrain]

My brother went to the crusade
He got himself religion
Neglected home and country, sailed off with not a glance
And if this country’s lucky
He’ll not come back to haunt it
Kiss my ass I rule here now
You’ll die upon a lance

[Refrain]

And if I could just rule here
And get my freakin’ taxes
I think that I could do much, this country I’d improve
But they’re scared of Robin Hood and
They’re scared of all my taxes
And I really need this money now, though you disapprove

[Refrain]

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