Blind Date on My Island

TTTO “Blind Date on the Island of Dr. Moreau” by Brooke Lunderville

I watch you sleep there next to me
This does not happen to me often
I fall alseep and dream about our future
Specifically, on how you escape this coffin
I was a bit rough,
You called the police off-
icers, and I fear it’s too late
To continue our date

[Chorus]
I saw an ad: Sexy scientist seeks Mr. Right
For romantic walks on the beach and labwork late in to the night
I rushed to reply to that online ad that I saw
I don’t wish to get my hopes up, and by so doing invoke Murphy’s law
I know there are so many spammers on Craig’s list who’re baiting
So here it goes, I’ll dip my toes into this “online dating”

I knew that you’re into chemistry
And this, I’m happy to say, I know best
So I showed you just how with acid’s I’m skilled
And tried to woo you with a litmus test
As I prepared to meet you
I hoped that you’d be sweet but,
You taste a lot like mussel
Eating you was just a hassle

[Chorus]

So guys if you meet a girl who
Seems sweet but has a friend with a chainsaw
Tell her the two of you are through
But could you ask her friend to go out?
And just take out the LART
No, really, use the LART
And enjoy a night of terror
Just do not repeat my error

[Chorus]
I saw an ad: Sexy scientist seeks Mr. Right
For romantic walks on the beach and labwork late in to the night
I rushed to reply to that online ad that I saw
I guess I got my hopes up, and by so doing invoked Murphy’s law
I knew there are so many spammers on Craig’s list who’re baiting
And so it went, not how I meant, this deal with “online dating”

Well maybe I’ll destroy the world…

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